Like most parents, I have always seen it as part of my duty not only to protect my child from harm, but also from worry and anxiety, at least where this is possible. For example, a few years ago it seemed that we might lose our house. This was very worrying for me as an adult, but I could see no earthly reason to make the children upset about the prospect of being turfed out of their home, especially as there was absolutely nothing they could do to help. I accordingly said nothing to them about it. In the event, matters resolved themselves. If it had been inevitable that we would have to move, then I might of course have adopted a slightly different strategy, slowly accustoming them to the idea of moving. I am circuitously approaching the subject of visits by local authority officers to home educating families, something about which many parents are up in arms.
The truth is, coverage of the Badman report in the newspapers and on television has been sparse in the extreme. Unless their parents had made a point of telling their children about it and explaining what they see as the hidden implications in the recommendations, it is unlikely that many children would even know anything of the matter. I find it strange then that so many children are apparently becoming distressed and anxious over the possibility of home visits. Such anxiety must surely be coming from their mothers and fathers?
It is by no means certain at the moment whether the law relating to home education is actually going to change. If and when it does, there will be many months to prepare children for the prospect of a visit by the local authority. What reason can there be to upset children by telling them a lot of scare stories about new laws that have not even been passed yet? It strikes me that it is the parents who are getting worked up about all this and frightened of the idea that people will be entering their homes to assess the quality of the educational provision being made for their children. I make no comment at all on this; I have no idea whether they are right to be concerned about it. What I am quite sure of is that it is, to say the least of it, unfortunate, if their children are roped into the business as well and made to share their parents anxieties. In other words, I think that it is not Graham Badman, the local authority or its agents who are making the children distressed, but their own parents.
I was not exactly enchanted when Essex LEA notified me that they wanted to come busybodying round the place to see what I was up to with my own daughter. However, as I said at the select committee, I do recognise that society has a stake in my child and so I did not tell them to get lost. Nor did I mention the matter to my eight year old daughter. There would have been no point; it might have made her feel nervous. Instead, I waited until after breakfast on the morning that the visit was due and then said casually, as though I had just remembered it, "Oh by the way, some fool is coming from the council later. They want to make sure that I'm not keeping you chained up in the attic." She laughed and we carried on as usual. the result was that the woman's visit was of no more significance to my daughter than a visit from the man coming to read the gas meter. This is in stark contrast to accounts that have been placed in the comments here from mothers who say that visits from the LA cause the family to be tense for a couple of months in advance and for a month or so afterwards. According to such parents, the whole business causes disruption to their way of life and alters the style of their educational methods. I am pretty sure that tension of this sort is all too often created, or at least greatly exacerbated, by parents.
I rather suspect that as the prospect of new regulations draws ever closer, so we shall be hearing more and more alarming stories of children on the verge of nervous breakdowns at the thought of LA officers entering their homes. I do not for a moment suppose that the children's fears are being encouraged deliberately, but I cannot help but think that it is unnecessary for us to pass our own worries onto our children in this way.
I suspect that children instinctively know when their parents are very worried about something, though not necessarily exactly what they're worried about. This could lead to higher anxiety on the children's part as imagination takes hold and thinks of all the possible things that might be going wrong, so bad that the parent can't share the information with them. In my opinion it's better, therefore, to tell the truth in as balanced and calm a way as possible.
ReplyDeleteYou must be a good actor to have completely hidden your fears from your children! Mine know me too well: I couldn't possibly fool them.
Yes, you are absolutely right. Children, mine included, do pick up on their parents' anxieties and sense that something is wrong. This is of course an argument for telling children the nature of problems in the first place and not concealing them. As you say, they might otherwise suspect something even worse!
ReplyDeleteI could pull the wool over my son's eyes perhaps, but not my daughter's. She can tell from a fleeting micro expression if I'm not happy about something.
ReplyDeleteWe follow the approach if they don’t ask we don’t tell. There’s never any need to pass adult fears onto a child. I agree children do pick up on the atmosphere in a house and as a parent you can usually judge when’s appropriate to tell children news.
ReplyDeleteI’ve heard some really horror stories from children in the home ed group on par with the child snatcher from chitty chitty bang bang, now I know children have a vivid imaginations but for a fear to escalate that much the seed must have been planted by a parent. Why as a parent would you be so cruel?
Maybe these parents think if they instil the fear into their children and when that knock comes the children panic, they can then excuse them self’s on medical grounds as the child borders breakdown or am I being to cynical there?
As for LEA visits my husband told the boys throw her of guard, told them to answer the door invite her in offer her tea and biscuits then drown her in all your work and it worked we’ve had a good relationship ever since.
I don't think that you are being too cynical at all, Amy. I think that is exactly what is happening; I just didn't want to put it so bluntly!
ReplyDelete"As for LEA visits my husband told the boys throw her of guard, told them to answer the door invite her in offer her tea and biscuits then drown her in all your work and it worked we’ve had a good relationship ever since."
ReplyDeleteI think that would be our approach if the LA ever made an appointment with us.
However, seeing as there are no school spaces in my borough, I think they're quite happy to leave home educators alone.
I'm not quite sure how they would find the equivalent of 3 classes within the borough if they thought we were not doing a good job, and that's just the registered HE'ers.
I just can't see these recommendations working in over stretched education departments, and with cut backs in the pipeline.
If we flood them with paperwork, they'll simply not be able to cope. :)
Simon, I have to disagree with you about not discussing the present issues with our children. After all it is the children the LA inspectors want to speak to. It is the children who are going to be expected to exhibit their personal work. It is only courteous to explain the possible scenario to them and ask for their input on the matter. Their feelings count. How can parents respond to the issues in the Badman report without knowing how their children feel about the matter. Let us not forget the report is supposed to be about balancing the childrens rights and they have a right to know what is happening and how it might affect them. We can hardly sit and wait until the g/ment bring in all these leglislations then make a kerfuffle about them as they would naturally ask why we said nothing beforehand! I daresay there are some children who won't mind having a visit. I'm sure there are those children who don't have a choice in the matter as their parents make the decision for them! There are those children whoever who do not want a visit and their wishes should be respected. I'm sure children would speak for themselves to those who want to bring in these laws but unfort, as with the probs parents are having, none of these people are willing to listen.
ReplyDeleteI do agree that we have a duty to protect our children; of course how much any child or young person can understand will vary with age. My (autistic) daughter has a completely irrational fear of some things (as demonstrated by her hysterical behaviour at a recent attempted hospital visit) but wouldn't be too phased by anything educational- but is just her. Do I want to worry one of my children about something that might not even happen?... definately not.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I do think that it can be difficult for home educating parents not to worry themselves about the review (if they are against it) and so they naturally want to spend their time with other home educating families discussing it - and so some children are bound to pick up on things even if the parents don't actually discuss it with them.
Some families do inflict their fears on their children deliberately though...I saw this in action with the police/social services turned up to interview a local family (not home educators). The children were very upset (which was understandable)...but the first thing the children said was "are you going to take us into foster care?" and "are you going to split us up?". Now those fears must have been implanted by their parents. I do hope that some home educators are not following the same path.
Sorry to interrupt -Just wondering if/when you are planning to respond to my comment on SEN, Simon :-)
ReplyDeleteSue, I sent you a personal email the day before yesterday. Did you not get it? I shall post it on the special needs bit.
ReplyDeleteSorry suzyg, I was assuming that you are in fact Sue Gerrard and I sent an email to you. I have now posted this under the special needs piece I did a wekk or so ago. Sorry for the delay.
ReplyDeleteYes, I did get your email Simon, but people who read your blog can't read my emails (I hope) and I felt some qualification of your comments on SEN was required. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThanks to the media and other people hearing about the review and discussing media articles about home educators, children find out. Those old enough to understand then want to explore what it is all about. This happen with my children. Which unduely upset them. We then had to help them overcome this.
ReplyDeleteBut its easy to keep them away from the news on the computers as I view later out of watchful eyes. But it still goes to show it is not always the parents that cause this anxiety.
let's not forget the gov. want to hear the childrens views. It concerns them too. Radio coverage does not help and neither do friends they play with after hearing it from school childrens or other adults who read different papers, view different channels, read the web. listen to the radio. As you see it is all around us.
please don't put it all down to the parents. Many are doing their best to deal with these issues their selves. They don't want their children upset know more then society does. But the Government do involve the children in this, so that is a point to remember Simon.
Tell me, how have the government involved children in this? By which I mean, how would the average home educated child have heard from the government about the recommendations of the Badman Report? I am also curious to know how many schoolchildren are discussing it! In fact, hardly anybody apart from home educating parents and profesionals in the field have any sort of awareness of this at all. I am, as I say, pretty sure that if it were not for their parents thenthe vast majority of home educated children would not have heard anything at all about this and therefore not be at all worried. I do not suppose that most parents have done this deliberately, I think it more likely that they did not consider how it would affect children. Let's be honest, children don't really read the Time Educational Supplement or the education sections of the Independent and Telegraph. This whole business is simply not in the public awareness.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if some of the children who are most anxious about this would be those who fall into the school phobia category.
ReplyDeleteI can imagine the following scenario; child unhappy at school, perhaps bullied, desperate enough to truant, parent being responsible and trying to work things out with the school and EWO (or whatever the word is now? Educational Social worker?), EWO tries to force child back into school, child almost suicidal with fear about school, parent finally deregisters to rescue child. THEN, who turns up to chat about HE? The same EWO! (EWO's are the 'HE visitors' in some LA's.)
I can see how some children might well be anxious about that situation. I wonder if it is the parents of children in that situation who are the most concerned (and most vocal) about their children's fear of being visited.
I can understand that, can't you?
Ooops, forgot to sign that. It was MOI, Mrs Anon.
ReplyDeleteYes indeed, I can understand that. I certainly see that having had bad experiences at school and perhaps having been pursued for school phobia/truancy, you woulddn't be best pleased to see an EWO walking down your garden path. But all the more alarming implications of the Badman report are not on the surface, they have largely been built up as a kind of mythology. The sentence about speaking to a child alone, if deemed necessary, has ben turned into children being taken off for interrogation. It is this sort of thing which is scaring children; not the original report but what adults around them are saying about it.
ReplyDeleteBut it's important to consider that the Badman recommendations are to give Local Authorities the power to decide whether to interview a child alone. The parents - who presumably know and love the child - won't get a say in the matter. The giving of this power is a huge change to the present situation but it's one that, bizarrely, you seem to want to play down.
ReplyDeleteThey're not just coming up the garden path. They will have the power to do so much more than that, as they see fit.
The problem is, as always, with things like this, that there are two extreme camps. On the one hand are those in local authorities who rpbably do not approve of home education and who might very well be inclined to burden home educating parents down with so much red tape and so many petty rules that they might just give up and send their kids to school. On the other hand are parents, some of them autonomous educators who take a precisely oppsite stand. For them, any and every intrusion into, or even questions about, what they are doing with their children are comletely unacceptable. Somewhere between these two points of view lies a middle path. it is this which I want. On the one hand, parents must be free to educate their own children as they see fit. On the other hand, society as represented by LAs has a right to ask what is going on with the children adn also to iffer advice. This is a fine balancing act and however it is done there will be those on both sides who complain.
ReplyDeleteI have always taken the appproach that I am honest with my children. Since they were little they have known that there were people (and sometimes we would encounter them) who thought we were not a family and that my partner and I should not 'be allowed' to have children. Of course, we took the line that these people were ignorant and more to be pitied than feared. The joy of the time and place in which we live being that other people's ignorance cannot stop us living as a family.
ReplyDeleteIf home education is regulated in accordance with Badman's recommendations, then local authority officials will have a right of entry to our home and powers to judge our lives against a plan which they must approve. This is far beyond "asking what is going on".
Of course, I still take the line with my children that this is based on ignorance and not something to be feared. They are not scared and I would hope they never have cause to be. But the truth is that these may turn out to be seriously destructive powers. Some people have been suffiently harmed by previous encounters with local authorities that it is hardly surprising that they (adults and children alike) are scared.
Allie, I can't find anything at all about anybody needing to "judge" home educators lives against a plan! The closest thing I can see is in Recommendation 1. of the Badman Report, where it is suggested that parents will be expected to provide "a clear statement of their educational approach, intent and desired/planned outcomes for the child over the next twelve months." From all that i could gather from listening to Graham Badman on Monday, this will be intereprted very liberally. I really don't think that this can be called "judging". More that the LA will have some idea about what approach you are using and what you might hope your child will achieve over the next year. the only references to refusing permission to register as a home educator are not in connection with this, but specifically on safeguarding grounds.
ReplyDeleteI was going to ask what it was about you and your partner which might cause people to think that you were not a proper family, but having clicked on your profile, I now understand. My imagination had by that time gone into overdrive as I tried to visualise what sort of grotesque creature you might be keeping copmpany with to make people think this! I'm surprised that you have idiots like that in Brighton.
It's fine in Brighton (with the occasional, inevitable exception) but a 'family campsite' on the Isle of Wight proved a rather more challenging environment!
ReplyDeleteI'm really not bothered about telling people about our approach when they ask. I've told my LA. But, as you know, I'm not able to tell them what I want my children to achieve in the next year. Given the fashionable conflation of education and welfare in government minds (it's all "Every Child Matters" stuff, after all) I'm not at all convinced that resistance over this will not be treated as a welfare concern.
I suspect that how individual families get treated will depend as much on the prejudices of individual council officers as anything more substantial. I know this happens already. (On a personal level, I know that being a university educated, middle class person has often been to my advantage when dealing with officials of all sorts.) But giving those officers more powers seems reckless to me. Mind you, this government is quite happy to be reckless with other people's safety and liberty, so I'm not very hopeful that they will see the dangers.
I really don't think that you can have been firing on all cylinders Allie, when you booked up at a family camp site on the Isle of Wight! People say that the Isle of Wight is still as England used to be in the fifties, but they forget to mention that a lot of the racism and bigotry of the fities also lingers on there.
ReplyDeleteYes, indeed. But, you see, we also make the bizarre choice not to own a car and the IoW has excellent buses. Not excellent enough to tempt us back, mind you...
ReplyDelete