It is no particular secret that I had two main reasons for educating my own child entirely at home. One of these was that many maintained schools are so terrible now that one simply cannot rely upon them to deliver even the most rudimentary education effectively. The other motive was religious. I wanted my daughter to grow up learning about God and not to be over-influenced by the mores of today's society. I lived in Israel for years and am a Zionist who believes that the Bible contains a good deal of solid information regarding what the Lord requires from us. We must care for the feeble and sick, be loving and kind to strangers, protect the widow and orphan; stuff like that. The two passages which underpinned the plans for my daughter's upbringing were Proverbs 22: 6, 'Train up a child in the way he will go and when he is old, he will not depart from it' and also from Proverbs, 1: 7, 'The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, but fools despise wisdom and instruction'.
I am aware that at this point many readers will be dismissing me as being a cross between Dot Cotton on Eastenders and a gun toting, Bible waving loony from the American deep South, but so be it! I have an idea that in fact many British home educators like having their children at home for precisely similar reasons to mine. I don't mean that their children's earliest writing practice was, like my daughter's, copying out the Commandments. I am thinking in a broader sense about transmitting their own particular values to their children and trying to counter what they see as dangerous and pernicious trends which affect children at school adversely. I have the impression, and it is no more than that, that a lot of home educators are at least as much concerned about how their child's character is formed as they are about what academic progress the kid makes when a teenager.
One seldom hears parents of school children speaking enthusiastically about the habits and belief systems which their children have acquired at school. I can't remember when last I heard a mother say, 'Johnny has learned some really sound values since he began secondary school'. Most parents fret about the negative effects which other children have upon their own child, in a moral and ethical sense. Those who keep their kids at home with them are spared this. Of course it is not really the done thing these days to talk openly about the moral and spiritual education of children, but whatever terms we use, I think that this is still a big concern for many of us. I have an idea that whatever else has prompted people to undertake the education of their children themselves, this plays a big role in reassuring them that they have made the right decision.
'Those who keep their kids at home with them are spared this.'
ReplyDeleteI didn't 'keep my children at home'. In fact, we were probably not home often enough during our HE years ;-)
Character formation wasn't one of our initial reasons for choosing HE, but it certainly was one of the reasons we continued with it. The pay off now they are adults is staggering.
'I didn't 'keep my children at home'. In fact, we were probably not home often enough during our HE years ;-'
ReplyDeleteYes, since I am writing as a home educator, for other home educators, I rather took it for granted that we all know that children educated at home are not kept chained up in the cellar, but actually spend more time out and about in the real world than do those who are sent to school!
'The pay off now they are adults is staggering.'
I am constantly astonished at the difference in the way that my seventeen year-old daughter views the world compared with other teenagers with whom I am acquainted. The main difference is that she does not believe things on trust, just because she reads them in the newspapers or hears that some famous person is claiming this or that. She also follows her own ideas of right and wrong, even if these clash with what is generally accepted by society. All this is at least as valuable as having a bunch of GCSEs. I suspect that a lot of other parents have found the same thing and also see the development of character as having been an extremely important aspect of home education.
I really enjoyed this post and agree that for us it is one of the key things that keep us home educating.
ReplyDeleteI agree with anonymous too though that it wasn't my initial reason for HE.
We see a very clear difference in my my 'schooled' son and my 'homeschooled' daughter who are of roughly the same age.
Yes they are different sexes but the way they speak about things, the way they speak to me, and the way they speak to their friends are so clearly differnt its impossible to miss. Sometimes my daughter is considered naive but I like that she is protected from many things and has time to form her own opinions first.
Apologies for the appalling spelling mistakes etc, its been a long morning.
ReplyDeleteWebb – ‘be loving and kind to strangers’
ReplyDeleteThe evidence of the contents of your blog is that you fail to practice what you preach by berating every stranger that does not sycophantically bow to your deluded thoughts as being a ‘lonney’. Is this the example that you gave your daughter? It is Hypocritical.
Dave M
I hope that I have not inadvertantly offended any members of the ‘lonney’ community. Incidentally Anonymous, have you ever thought about buying a thesaurus? I ask, because every single post of yours now contains the word 'berate'. Why not try replacing it occasionally with synonyms such as reprove, reprimand, chide or scold? This might have the effect of making your comments seem a little less hackneyed and repetitive.
ReplyDeleteDot Cotton! Excellent. I hope you don't have her smoking habit though.
ReplyDeleteAn interesting post. I guess there are things that my children would meet more at school that I am glad they avoid - sexual harassment and casual homophobia spring to mind. Talking with a friend recently she told me how the boys in her daughter's class at school would delight in sticking porn pictures under the girl's noses - using their phones of course. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised but it's not something my kids have met at home ed groups.
Mind you, I'm not of the belief that home ed is (or should be) some sort of hiding place from the evils of the world. I've met immoral and amoral folk in every walk of life - home ed included.
What I do find amusing is that some people home educate to avoid their children being taught about 'homosexual lifestyles'. In this town they run a fair chance of meeting a gay parent at any secular home ed event :-)
'What I do find amusing is that some people home educate to avoid their children being taught about 'homosexual lifestyles''
ReplyDeleteA hopeless enterprise indeed. My daughter will be working as an intern at Diva magazine in July. She certainly didn't learn about that sort of thing at school; must therefore have somehow picked it up here!
Wow! I used to read that many years ago but it seemed to lose its relevance once I was spending my time changing nappies rather than going out on the scene and my money on doctor who action figures rather than interesting collections of short stories. Hope she enjoys the experience.
ReplyDelete"I hope that I have not inadvertantly offended any members of the ‘lonney’ community. Incidentally Anonymous, have you ever thought about buying a thesaurus? I ask, because every single post of yours now contains the word 'berate'. Why not try replacing it occasionally with synonyms such as reprove, reprimand, chide or scold? This might have the effect of making your comments seem a little less hackneyed and repetitive."
ReplyDeleteThe repetitive constant is purposeful and powerful propaganda.
I, like many others on this list, hardly need lessons in grammar or usage from you.
So once again a demonstration of your commitment to kindness to strangers.
Hypocrisy is necessary, if we were all as good as we thought people should be there'd be no room for improvement.
ReplyDeleteWe shouldn't be too hard on Simon for believing people should be better than he is currently able to me.
Aren't we all in similar positions.
Elizabeth
'So once again a demonstration of your commitment to kindness to strangers.'
ReplyDeleteWell of course I am only human. If, as is the case here, somebody comes on here regularly with no other purpose than to be abusive to me, I am bound to get a little sharp in return from time to time. Try posting in a sensible way without using the word 'berate' or 'deluded' and you may get a diffferent response from me.
'Anonymous said...
ReplyDeleteHypocrisy is necessary, if we were all as good as we thought people should be there'd be no room for improvement.
We shouldn't be too hard on Simon for believing people should be better than he is currently able to me.
Aren't we all in similar positions.
Elizabeth'
The more I read this comment, the less sense I am able to make of it. Why the author supposes that everybody believes that people should be better than they are themselves able to be, I have no idea. If we all spent a little more time focusing upon our own shortcomings and less time fretting about other people's, then the world might, I suppose, be a better place. I have no idea how good people should be or how I would compare with them in some 'goodness' stakes. It is not the sort of thing which concerns me. I can only worry about my own morality; not that of others. I am guessing here that whoever wrote this has seen the word 'Bible' and at once, like a Pavlovian response, the word 'hypocrite' has come into her mind. This is quite a common association these days and many people tend to assume that anybody who reads the Bible is sure to be a busybodying hypocrite who likes to feel more virtuous than his neighbour. It is part of the ethos of this era. People who would not dream of making snide comments about somebody who mentions the Qu'ran are often quick to make a negative judgement about those who mention the Bible.
"I am guessing here that whoever wrote this has seen the word 'Bible' and at once, like a Pavlovian response, the word 'hypocrite' has come into her mind."
ReplyDeleteMy impression is that is was you mentioning the value of being loving and kind to strangers (rather than the word, Bible) that triggered the word, hypocrite.