Thursday 30 June 2011

Meanwhile, down in Somerset...

It is no particular secret that British home educators are prone to squabbling among themselves; this happens at both a national and local level. On the national level, there is a constant struggle to be the top dog organisation for home educators. Education Otherwise has held the crown for so many years that others sometimes despair of supplanting it. Every so often, discontented members split off and found their own projects; the Home Education Advisory Service for example or Home Education UK. HE-UK, under the personal control of Mike Fortune-Wood certainly has pretensions to become the leading home education group in the country. The owner of this particular organisation often predicts the imminent downfall of Education Otherwise, but this never actually seems to happen. There are other contenders for the leadership of British home educators. Home Education Forums is one of these. They are so ambitious, that last year they had the cheek to approach Mike Fortune-Wood and suggested that since they were so clearly the market leaders these days, HE-UK should sell them their brand so that they could take over it themselves. Mike Fortune-Wood was singularly unimpressed by this proposal!

This factionalism is also evident at a local level; just look at Somerset. Now before we go any further, and going off at a slight tangent, I have to say that I find something more than a little odd about grown up women who use little-girl names for each other. I have two old friends called Jennifer and Rebecca. I have know them both for many years, but even so if I took the liberty of addressing them as Jenny, Becki or Becks; I strongly suspect that I would get a thick ear. Not so among the home educating parents of Somerset, most of whom seem to be known by endearing little diminutives like Linny and Ali or Tans and Jacs. Yuk! Is this hideously twee or what? Having mentioned Ali, otherwise known as the charming and delightful Alison Edgeley, I cannot help making an observation. When I gave evidence at the select committee in October 2009, there was an outcry because I was no longer apparently a home educator; my daughter having turned sixteen two months earlier. Home education was said no longer to be any of my business. What then shall we say of Alison Edgeley, who hoofed her own children back to school five years ago because they were getting in the way of a new business which she was trying to launch? Five years down the line and she is still mixed up in home education; posting on forums and lists and even making a nuisance of herself anonymously on here.

Now the Somerset home educators are forever falling out with each other and flying at each other throats in a rage. (Metaphorically, you understand. I don’t mean to suggest that the citizens of Frome are having to dodge round furious catfights in the street between brawling home educators!) They exchange angry and tearful telephone calls and emails; constantly falling out and then making up again with hugs and kisses. Last year, Tania Berlow and Jacquie Cox were jointly submitting evidence to Parliament, but today they are at daggers drawn over who is actually teacher’s pet. Both are upset because each thought that she was Alison Sauer’s favourite. This has caused both of them to make spiteful and bitchy comments , not only about each other, but also about various friends and supporters. Linny for instance, a chum of Jacs‘, was so upset by Tans that Jacs had to comfort her with tea and cake.

One of the things about the this bunch that should act as a warning sign to all right-thinking people is that they all of them make a fetish of their honesty, integrity and, most significantly, their ability to speak plainly. Now I have often met men and women who announced that they were outspoken and told it as it was. Men who proclaim, ’I’m John Blunt; I call a spade a spade and don’t have any time for pussyfooting around’. Without exception, such characters turn out to be rude, insulting and abrasive. I have to say that, judging by what I have so far seen, the home educating Linnys , Alis, Tans and Jacs of Somerset seem to fit perfectly into this pattern!

37 comments:

  1. Simon,
    Firstly, I really dont think the bitchiness and in-fighting is only in Somerset. Everywhere I go, or have been whilst HEing, I hear of it. Sadly, despite my prior delusions to the contrary, the behaviour and in-fighting can often be nastier than some of the antics in school playgrounds. I might even go so far as to say, women as a species seem to be incredibly bitchy people (Yes that is a huge generalisation for which of course there are many exceptions.)

    Secondly, what makes you think Tania and Jacs are fighting? People get upset with each other all the time. Even in very good friendships people dont have to always agree with each others opinions and actions, misunderstandings can be riff but that doesnt mean friendships dont still exist. Even with everything that has happened recently in HE, it doesnt have any bearing if the core friendship is stable.

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  2. ‘Firstly, I really don’t think the bitchiness and in-fighting is only in Somerset. ‘

    It isn’t. I only gave Somerset as a recent example.

    ‘Secondly, what makes you think Tania and Jacs are fighting? ‘


    Well, perhaps it was Jacquie Cox saying:

    ‘Tans, when you are in a hole, you should really stop digging. I have allowed you to undermine me in public because I understood your need to not make bad friends with people on either side. You carry on ...

    Now I am going to give Linny a cup of coffee and some birthday cake, because she is very upset.

    Tans, you and I are done. ‘

    What do you think? Looks like fighting to me!

    Simon.

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  3. That behaviour isn't confined to Somerset.

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  4. These 'endearing little diminutives', it's all a bit ok yah faux upper/middle claaass dahling.

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  5. I blame mumsnet.

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  6. As amusing and childish that this behaviour is, very much like a school playground and shows a lack on confidence in one's self worth. I do find it worrying that these prominent names in HE are so involved with policy making, guidance writing, etc. I think the saying is "the lunatics are running the asylum".

    Now, I am not calling anyone in particular a lunatic, before I am told off. It just seems an odd situation that a minority group, of a minority group, has so much perceived power and influence.

    As for endearing little diminutives, I did have a chuckle at that as I am almost universally know as Suzi, but my full name is actually Suzanna. Although, I do know the behaviour that you are describing, and it is a bit sickly and fake.

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  7. This sort of thing happens everywhere, not just in somerset. And it's one of the main reasons why I personally do not get too involved with any particular organisation.
    There are some great, friendly and helpful folks out there, and it is their company I would rather put myself in.
    I consider myself to be one of those blunt types, a spade is indeed a spade, and if someone wants me to say it is anything else, they are going to be disappointed. But I know when to speak my mind and when to keep quiet. I avoide brash and abrasive outbursts, and equally avoid those who do not adhere to such.
    At the end of the day, any self respecting and responsible HEer should not look too closely at a bunch of people who seem to garner some enjoyment from discord. We are meant to be educating our children here after all 0.0

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  8. 'I consider myself to be one of those blunt types, a spade is indeed a spade'

    Which is fair enough, Loz. I am not generally known a as man likely to call a spade a manual digging implement myself! However, I was talking about those types who always go on about how honest, sincere and outspoken they are. This raises my hackles. For example, the person who made this comment; apparently without a hint of irony:


    ' I'm overly sincere.

    It's what I have to tell future employers during job interviews when they ask me what my greatest weakness is. I can't help myself.

    Simon

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  9. 'This sort of thing happens everywhere, not just in somerset.'

    It's also not confined to HE. School staffrooms are probably some of the scariest, b*tchiest, most gossippy places I've ever had the misfortune to frequent.

    Also, the male teachers all added 'o' or 'y' to their surnames which struck me as a little odd. 'Jonesy' etc

    The point is that any human organisation, or group of humans anywhere, is going to contain poor attitudes and behaviour from a few. None of us is perfect. Me especially :-)

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  10. "Without exception, such characters turn out to be rude, insulting and abrasive. I have to say that, judging by what I have so far seen, the home educating Linnys , Alis, Tans and Jacs of Somerset seem to fit perfectly into this pattern!"

    Stir, stir, stir... Sounds like you'd fit right in, Simon.

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  11. I have been out all day and only just seen your reply. Yes it that kind of wording does seem like they have fallen out. I guess its for them to decide whether it really is a permanent thing.

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  12. "Meanwhile, down in Somerset... "

    You've obviously taken a liking to the Soap Opera theme, Simon. What will he reveal next, da da dahhh!

    ReplyDelete
  13. 'It's also not confined to HE. School staffrooms are probably.....'
    'Also the male teachers....'
    That was Grange Hill, not a real experience.

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  14. >>>'It's also not confined to HE. School staffrooms are probably.....'
    'Also the male teachers....'
    That was Grange Hill, not a real experience.<<<

    I wouldn't know as I've never seen the show. I'm a wee bit too old for it. My pupils in the 1980's enjoyed it though.

    Tell me, if you are the same person who questioned my teaching background a few days ago, why do you find it so unbelievable that a home educator can also be/have been a teacher? In our family's HE groups over the years about a quarter of the parents we encountered were or are teachers.

    I know it doesn't fit with a rigid 'us against them' narrative that some teachers and home educators have about each other. Nevertheless, it is the situation.

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  15. You're the only one with the 'them' and 'us' issues.

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  16. 'You're the only one with the 'them' and 'us' issues.'

    I'm afraid that I don't have the faintest clue as to what you are talking about, Mr Argumentative. I'll simply re-post what I said earlier.

    'The point is that any human organisation, or group of humans anywhere, is going to contain poor attitudes and behaviour from a few. None of us is perfect. Me especially :-)'

    And leave it at that.

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  17. It's pretty obvious that you don't understand anything about group dynamics.
    You mentioned 'them and us', you're bigoted.

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  18. The rest of society don't give a fig, we're all in it together.

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  19. "It's pretty obvious that you don't understand anything about group dynamics.
    You mentioned 'them and us', you're bigoted."

    How old are you?

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  20. Old enough to recognise you as a a bigot, young enough to find your attitude unacceptible.

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  21. Here's where your cliched prejudice falls down.
    What you describe as being 'the scariest, bitchiest, most gossipy places....' could actually be said to be the same for any large workplace canteen/staffroom.

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  22. Those weren't my comments about your age. There are other anons commenting here, of course.

    The problem with selective quoting is that you miss the whole truth.

    'It's also not confined to HE. School staffrooms are probably some of the scariest, b*tchiest, most gossippy places I've ever had the misfortune to frequent.'

    Note 'some of'. Then I went on to say,

    'The point is that any human organisation, or group of humans anywhere, is going to contain poor attitudes and behaviour from a few.'

    I think that covers 'large workplace canteens.'

    The definition of bigotry is surely when people continue to hold negative views about something and someone in the face of contrary evidence. It's clearly important to you to cling to your prejudices though, so I am moving on again. I suggest you find a new hobby.

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  23. Simon, I suspect you wouldn't know irony if it bit you on your botty.

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  24. Angry anonymous wrote,

    "Old enough to recognise you as a a bigot, young enough to find your attitude unacceptible."

    You seem able to pass judgement on a person based on the smallest amount of information. How on earth can you tell I'm a bigot because I asked your age? What's unacceptable about asking someone their age?

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  25. Your comments here prove that you're bigoted and also passive-aggressive.

    ReplyDelete
  26. You've only got to substitute your word 'teachers' for 'blacks'.
    There's lots of 'contrary evidence' that teachers aren't all as bad as you say they are.

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  27. "You've only got to substitute your word 'teachers' for 'blacks'."

    Except I didn't mention teachers. All I asked was, 'how old are you?', and from this you seem able to conclude that I'm bigoted, passive-aggressive and have an unacceptable attitude. Amazing!

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  28. 'Also the male teachers.......'
    That's just from this thread.

    ReplyDelete
  29. "'Also the male teachers.......'
    That's just from this thread."

    Anonymous, anonymous, anonymous. You've go to have realised by now that there are more than two anonymous people commenting here? I didn't say, 'also the male teachers...'. All I said was , 'how old are you?'. Nothing more, nothing less. Yet from this you conclude I'm a bigot, etc, etc...

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  30. "Not so among the home educating parents of Somerset, most of whom seem to be known by endearing little diminutives like Linny and Ali or Tans and Jacs. Yuk! Is this hideously twee or what?"

    LOL! Meawww. What next, Simon? Maybe you don't like their hair styles or their dress sense either? Or maybe their address is too working class or too high class?

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  31. Pictures with moustaches drawn on, I expect.

    ReplyDelete
  32. LOL! Yes, I can just picture that.

    ReplyDelete
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