Thursday 21 November 2013

I think my son must be autistic…



Reading the Ofsted publication, Local Authorities and Home Education, 090267,  2010; something rather curious strikes one. After mentioning that a quarter of the parents who spoke to the inspectors had children with special educational needs, the report continues;

There were also those whose parents, often supported by medical diagnosis, identified the children (many of whom were very able) as having some form of autistic spectrum disorder. 

I understand this to mean that among the parents who met the inspectors were those who had themselves diagnosed their own children as being on the autistic spectrum, without any clinical input by a doctor,  educational psychologist  or anybody else. This is not in the least surprising; claiming that their children are autistic, dyslectic or are  suffering from dyspraxia,  is something of a theme running through large swathes of the British home education scene. How many readers have either heard at groups or read on blogs and internet lists, statements such as;

I’m sure my son has Aspergers

I told his teacher that I thought she was dyslectic

I think he may be on the spectrum

Now it’s entirely possible that some of these children will go on to be diagnosed with such syndromes, but an awful lot won’t. In fact  some of these parents admit that their son or daughter has seen a psychologist who has found no signs of autism or dyslexia. This does not shake their conviction that there is a neurological reason for their child’s inability to learn to read or get on with other kids.

This seems to be a particularly home educating thing. Most of the parents that I have dealings with at schools,  commonly resist any suggestion that their children are different; let alone that they have some kind of learning difficulty.  Home educating parents, by contrast, often  embrace the idea with a strange fervor! I am not at all sure why this should be, but there is no doubt at all that it is something which crops often in  home education in this country.  Even more curious is the way in which some home educating parents then adopt autism as an identity for themselves. They suddenly  realise that the reason that they didn’t have many friends when they were at school was because they were autistic. Obviously, they were geniuses,  savants on the spectrum  who went unrecognised by their stupid teachers! This really is a home educating thing; in the sense that I have never encountered it in any other parents. This self-identification with people with Kanner’s and Asperger’s syndromes can be taken to weird extremes. The woman running the biggest face book group for home educators, she lives in Doncaster, even signed up to an Aspies’ dating site a couple of years back.

None of this is to suggest that many home educated children are not on the autistic spectrum.  I am merely observing that whereas in the schooled population there is often a reluctance to accept such a diagnosis, among home educators it seems almost to be a badge of honour; allowing them to join the club, as it were!

13 comments:

  1. Gosh, I wish home educators in my area viewed autism as a badge of honour! Unless, of course, my diagnosed children have the wrong sort of autism?

    I'd also disagree with your view that there is a resistance to diagnosis in the schooled population. In my experience parents know that their child is 'different' and the resistance comes from professionals, sometimes because they genuinely feel that labelling is unhelpful and sometimes because a diagnosis is another step on the way to the child accessing support.

    Maybe I'm biased because my 2 have high functioning autism (Bright as they come, but incredibly acute senses, no natural social skills or need to be round other people and a lack of tact that has to be seen to be believed). Because they're academically fine, the problems they had with other kids and the school environment were invisible and it was easy to label them 'disruptive' when they couldn't cope without the support their statements made it clear that they needed, but that the school didn't think was necessary.

    As for embracing the diagnosis for myself, I've never been interested in labelling anything. I wanted to know if there was a reason for the difficulties my children have interfacing with the world, and, if there was, how I could help them. If they'd wanted to call them Martians it'd have been fine by me as long as they then told me how to help them be happy Martians rather than unhappy and unable to cope with a world that often doesn't make sense to them.

    (It doesn't make sense to me either a lot of the time, but I'm not convinced that's a sign of autism.)

    Anne

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    1. "If they'd wanted to call them Martians it'd have been fine by me as long as they then told me how to help them be happy Martians rather than unhappy and unable to cope with a world that often doesn't make sense to them."

      I doubt you would want your Local LA to refer to your children as martians? if your children have autism then that is what their have and should get all the support help their need from your LA.
      your right about the resistance comes from professionals who want to block support as this will cost money for the school LA .
      I been very lucky in that Peter does not have autism or special needs in the way most people think.He gifted but you get no help from your LA for this the college he goes to helps gifted children and he on that program so we lucky.
      Children with special needs should be helped far more than their are maybe people need to think about who their vote for raise this with the M.P for their area?

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  2. If only all parents thought like Anne and wanted the best for their children. For many parents of schooled children it is a badge of honour and also a 'get out of jail free card' that they can use to explain their childrens bad behaviour ,when the real reason is they cannot be bothered putting in the effort to bring them up properly. Makes it difficult for parents whose children have genuine issues.

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    1. "If only all parents thought like Anne and wanted the best for their children."

      Most parents do want the best for their children.It is the LA's/EWS who do not want the best for children and parents i wonder why?

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    2. Perhaps you can tell us?

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    3. anon says"Perhaps you can tell us"

      Who knows why your just have to ask the LA's/EWS why their do not want the best for each child and parent.

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    4. You stated this as a fact but don't know the answer?

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    5. I think they want what they perceive as being 'best.' but the problem with being a SEN professional of any sort is that every child is different so what's best for one child is wrong for another. Add to that the different family dynamics and it needs a flexibility that I only seem to see in officials who end up off sick with stress or taking early retirement.

      My perception is that there is a desire for standardisation. I can see that this saves money, but it's not working for the children who don't fit what I'm pretty sure is a fictional 'norm.' and it must be a nightmare for the staff too.

      I recently met one of the professionals who worked with my son when he was at the pre-school stage and under the child development centre while we were in our local park. As she walked her dogs and I let my two run off their energy so they could settle to work when we got home I got an insight into what was going on in my Council's SEN department that left me feeling sorry for the people I'd thought were messing me around.

      Anne

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    6. Ann says"Add to that the different family dynamics and it needs a flexibility"

      Which box ticking officials can not give only standardization is what these people can give which has you know is of no use what so ever! in our case Peter was gifted but School/ LA officers could only offer standardization because this all these officers know.What is needed is for LA/school to accept that every child parent needs different support help but i case that would cost to much so much easier to carry on failing children/parent.

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  3. " I got an insight into what was going on in my Council's SEN department that left me feeling sorry for the people I'd thought were messing me around."

    It can be all to easy to assume bad intent where none is meant. We see things from our point of view, that the LAs are out to get us, but sometimes, as Anne has found out, when we put ourselves into someone else's shoes, we find that they too can be just as frustrated by the system as we are.

    As for parents seeking a label in order to let their children run wild, I have always made it clear that my son's autism is a reason why he behaves like that, it is never an excuse. Those who use it as an excuse to let their children do what they want are given those of us with SEND children a bad name.

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    1. "we find that they too can be just as frustrated by the system as we are".

      That sounds like an excuse to me if their so frustrated why don't their speak out to their line manger? or to a councilor?

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    2. If you had ever had a job Williams you might realise it's not that simple as your management are likely to be part of the problem

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  4. I love your blog you think lots of thing just the way I do but to my shame dare not say them for fear of being called all sorts
    in the facebook group Right to reply I got the link they tear you to shreds in there.
    there is a thread about AAPG and a good one about a child who has trashed a car good example of what you write here

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